The following beard enthusiasts will judge all beards. Feel free to pander to them.

Dustin Black

A native Nebraskan, Dustin Black transplanted himself to the Minnesota 10 years ago. Seeing a void in the national beard conversation, he started the website thebeardly.com in January 2009 as a celebration of man’s greatest achievement: the beard.

When not sifting through beard photos, Dustin can be found making ad things at mono in Uptown.

He is also the co-author of “The Book of SPAM” and maintains another hobby website, kittytoupee.com. He lives in Como Park with his wife, a diabetic cat, and his 6-month old beard.

Dustin’s criteria:

• Length of Beard – Size does matter. (10%)
• Density of Beard – Does the beard say “I am a man” or “I have
  pubic hair on my face.” (10%)
• Age – Old dudes grow better beards, period. (10%)
• Back-story – Is there a story with this beard? (10%)
• Style – Does the face support the beard, or does the beard
  support the face. (10%)
• General Manliness – Does your beard demand respect with hairy
  fists of rage or does it sit down to pee? (50%)

Jon Friedman

Jon Friedman is a Minnesota native who is proud of his beard heritage and has sported facial hair since he was in his early teens. In 2007, he made his competition debut at the World Beard and Moustache Championships in Brighton, England, and was the youngest competitor at the championships at the age of 19. Since then, Jon has become an even more avid bearder, trying to bring the light of beardlihood to others who would see the path.

Jon’s criteria:

• Manliness: Facial hair is a manly endeavor, so how manly does your growth make you? (40% points)
• Presentation: Cleanliness, neat lines, and good shape make a lot of difference. (40% points)
• Beardlihood (subjectivity criterion): Show a commitment to your facial hair, that you aren’t just a fairweather bearder. (20%)
• For the freestyle category: Creativity and Imagination (to replace manliness, worth 40%)

Courtney McLean

Courtney McLean is an actress, stand-up comedian, writer, storyteller, and improviser. Her one-woman storytelling plays, “Normal-C” and “Super Glossy!” have toured to Fringe Festivals across the nation. Courtney has worked with Girl Friday Productions, Theatre Arlo, and Four Humors Theatre. She is a proud founding member of Rockstar Storytellers.

Courtney’s criteria:

• Commitment
  • Fullness
  • Length
• Grooming
  • How’s your style?
  • Is your beard well-kept?
  • Is it dyed? (bonus points for awesome dye job, minus for horrible)
• Kissability
  • No food in the beard.
  • Clean around the mouth
  • Will it tangle with my lower beard?
  • Does your hair encumber your ability to talk?
• Is it proportionate to your hair?
• Does it accentuate your style or burden it?
• What does your facial hair say about you?
• Should you even be wearing a beard???